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Be Aware of Experts

A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman

This article is reprinted with permission from DEVIL WOMAN, the Diablo Valley Girls newsletter. Ms Freeman is the wife of a crossdresser. She can be reached at Julie39@comcast.net

Beware of Experts

Posted Jan 13, 2014

Several weeks ago, I watched a Dr. Phil show where he was talking about "gender-confused children." His goal was to help parents learn what to do when faced with a transgendered child.

On the one side, he had two "experts" who theorized that transgenderism was a phase and could be "cured." They also believed that not only is gender-change a choice, but homosexuality as well. They emphasized that mothers were largely responsible for their children desiring to be the opposite sex (over-involved is their terminology). And especially single mothers where there was no obvious male influence. Parents need to guide their children away from what they consider just a phase. They want the mother to back off (their wording) and bring the father into a more active role..)

On the other side was a mother of three boys, one of whom was transgendered. She was paired with two doctors (the most knowledgeable of any of the guests) who disagreed totally with the "family value experts" and cited scientific data which most of us in the gender community are aware of -- the nervous system being exposed to hormones, etc.

It was truly disturbing to listen to the "experts" who were suggesting that mothers not baby their sons, expose them to male influences, etc. I couldn't help but wonder if mothers watching this show would become terrified that they could possibly love their babies (especially sons) so much that they could influence their gender and/or sexual preferences.

And what about fathers watching the show! I could just see them prohibiting their sons from playing with any so-called feminine toys and restricting what the mothers could and could not do. I could see an increase in demanding their sons participate in "manly" activities whether they had an interest or not.

And what about transgendered children? What is going to happen to them if their parents follow the so-called "experts" advice?

The mother with a transgendered son did her best to negate what the so-called family experts were saying, but they treated her so condescendingly that her attempts to dispel their nonsense may not have been heard. Thankfully, the medical doctors said there was no evidence that mothers loving their sons could possibly lead to transsexualism.

Dr. Phil, himself, was not helpful when he repeated that only about 15% of transgendered children ever actually transition. There seemed to be an implication that those 85% who did not transition realized they were NOT transgendered, that it was simply a phase brought on perhaps by too much mothering. There are many reasons why transgendered folk do not transition and those reasons should have been listed and explained more thoroughly.

However, at the end of the show, Dr. Phil remained on stage with the doctor who made the most sense in terms of explaining the biological and genetic components of transgenderism. The doctor talked about how mothers facing transition with a child could best deal with the situation. This was quite good and it did appear that Dr. Phil was on the side of the medical doctors.

There were also other doctors who appeared very briefly who described hormone treatment at particular ages, etc., which helped to support the biological explanation of transgenderism.

I had expected to hear from my on-line support group of significant others regarding this show, but no one said a word. And I do wonder how many reading this newsletter watched this show and what their reactions were. Will there be any repercussions in terms of how parents treat their children, transgendered or not? I guess time will tell.

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