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SO Comfort Zone

A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman

This article is reprinted with permission from DEVIL WOMAN, the Diablo Valley Girls newsletter. Ms Freeman is the wife of a crossdresser. She can be reached at Julie39@comcast.net

 
Comfort Zone

When communicating with other significant others, I find a wide variety of acceptance levels. Some wives are totally non-accepting. They are hostile, angry, upset, and just about ready to walk out the door! They are disgusted with their husbands' activities and are in no frame of mind to listen to them or those of us who are more accepting. At the other end are those wives who are totally accepting. They love their husbands dearly and whatever the husband does is fine with them. They find it hard to understand those who cannot or will not support their husbands.


And then between those extremes are the vast majority who are not hostile, but are not totally supportive either. These wives are willing to listen to both sides and seem to appreciate...
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Ultimatums

A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman

Orignally published in "Devil Woman" in April 2015
Republished here by permission Februay 2017

Ultimatums

It seems that we have always lived in a world of ultimatums, but perhaps not as alarming and dire as we are discovering today.
Issuing ultimatums is not new. People have been threatening each other for years. Parents threatened their children with harsh punishment if duties were not carried out. Teachers threatened to fail their students if homework was not completed.
When going to church, we were subjected to sermons which capitalized on our fears by predicting doom and destruction wrought by a vengeful and heartless God if we did not do what that particularly religion preached.
Even good friends had falling outs over trivial issues. Family members quit speaking to each other. Business colleagues plotted revenge against those they believed wronged them.
But for the most part, ultimatums in the past did not seem quite s...
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Admiration


A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman

August 2013
Posted here by permission on January 26, 2017

Admiration

I have the upmost admiration for those wives and partners who with compassion and understanding accept their husband's transsexualism/transgenderism. We all know these women; they are the ones that scare significant others, particularly those new to crossdressing, for they are venturing into that part of genderland that most of us are unwilling and reluctant to go. They are the ladies that appear on panels or talk shows with "husbands" now living FULL TIME as women, some having had surgery (post-op transsexuals), others not (pre-op transsexuals or transgenderists).
These are the wives who have made the decision to let their families and friends know that their lives are now going to be quite different. Once a couple, now two ladies. If there are children involved, they will need to deal with the strong emotions and intense feelings as the children begin to...
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Normal Human Condition

A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman


April 27, 2007

Normal Human Condition

When significant others first find about their husbands’ crossdressing, they complain of what we call “the kid in the candy store” syndrome. Their husbands, newly out of the closet, just can’t seem to get enough of their newfound freedom and are driving their wives crazy with their continual talk of makeup, clothes, wigs, etc. They are hogging the Internet, looking for crossdressing websites, spending money right and left on female accoutrements, and attending gender activities that may interfere and interrupt their normal family activities.

Over time, the crossdresser settles down a bit as he becomes aware that he no longer will be forced back into the closet and in many cases his concerns about family help to moderate his social activities and expenses.

With this moderation may come a more positive attitude towards the crossdressing...
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Contributing to the Change

A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman


June 8, 2009


Editor's Note: Ms Freeman is the long time wife of a crossdresser. Her column "A Significant Other View" appears regularly in Devil Woman. She has given permission to reprint what follows.

Contributing to the Change

As many of you know, I belong to an on-line support group for wives and partners of transgendered individuals. This group ranges from women who are completely supportive and understanding of their partner's transgenderism to those who are hostile, repulsed, and completely intolerant. Most are somewhere between the two extremes, so emails can flow hot and heavy as viewpoints are debated, questioned, argued, and even ridiculed. Emotions run high, and it is rare indeed when anyone can look at an issue completely dispassionately.

Currently, the theory being suggested by those more unforgiving of their partner's transgenderism is the belief that those wives who support their husbands may in ...
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