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Peace of Mind

A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman

This article is reprinted here with permission from DEVIL WOMAN, the Diablo Valley Girls' newsletter. Ms Freeman is the wife of a crossdresser. She can be reached at Julie39@comcast.net

Peace of Mind

I have known about my husband's crossdressing for over 12 years! In the beginning, I was bewildered, confused, angry, afraid, embarrassed - you name it! It took a long time for me to come to grips with my husband's crossdressing and realize that this was not something he asked for. It was something he was born with! But he did everything he could to help me to understand why he crossdressed; he never put pressure on me to do anything or go anywhere I did not want to; he bent over backwards to help me to understand.

For years, he and so many others hid their "secret" as best they could from family, friends, colleagues, neighbors, etc. Society has made it clear that crossdressing is not considered "normal", that it may even be "...
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Significant Fears

A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman

This article is reprinted with permission from DEVIL WOMAN, the Diablo Valley Girls newsletter. Ms Freeman is the wife of a crossdresser. She can be reached at Julie39@comcast.net

Significant Fears

When crossdressers join support groups, it is not unusual for them to inquire about support groups for their wives or partners. Usually their wives have just recently found out about the crossdressing and are under great stress as their once peaceful lives have been severely jolted.

Their fears are quite significant. Does my husband want to become a woman? Is my husband gay? What about our children? Am I going to become a lesbian? Will my husband leave me for a man? How will his job be affected? Will he lose his job? What about our neighbors? What about our relatives? What about our friends? How will they react? Who can I tell? What about our finances? The list goes on and on. They fear his taking hormones; not sure of what medical outcomes may result. They f...
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Awkward Situations

Notes on Gender Role Transition
Anne Vitale Ph.D. Editor
A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman

This article is reprinted with permission from DEVIL WOMAN, the Diablo Valley Girls newsletter. Ms Freeman is the wife of a crossdresser. She can be reached at Julie39@comcast.net

Awkward Situations

I am sure almost every significant other can relate to the following situation. You are seated at a dinner table with a group of relatives, or perhaps a group of friends, or even a group of colleagues. And someone makes a derogatory remark about crossdressing. It starts innocently enough - discussing movies - which to see and which not to - and then someone mentions Esther Williams and her discovery of Jeff Chandler wearing her red evening gown! From there it progresses to "No wonder she left him after that" And then someone pipes up that Cary Grant also crossdressed! (I have no idea if that is true). Before long, the chatter becomes less innocent and more hostile. Gay bashing...
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Telling

Notes on Gender Role Transition
Anne Vitale Ph.D. Editor
A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman

This article is reprinted with permission from DEVIL WOMAN, the Diablo Valley Girls newsletter. Ms Freeman is the wife of a crossdresser. She can be reached at Julie39@comcast.net

Telling

I was asked recently about the best way to tell a significant other that one is a crossdresser. Oh boy, I thought. Is this not a loaded question! What works for one does not work for another. That we know. Just recently a significant other mentioned that she found out when her husband suddenly appeared in bed "en femme." Although she was shocked, she also found it erotic! Since then, she and her husband have had long talks and their lives have taken a turn for the better. He is happier than he has been in years and she has discovered that their poor relationship for the past few years was not her fault, but due to his guilt and shame over his desire to crossdress. So it ...
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Going Out

A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman

This article is reprinted with permission from DEVIL WOMAN, the Diablo Valley Girls newsletter. Ms Freeman is the wife of a crossdresser. Julie can be reached at Julie39@comcast.net. Her book, A Significant Other View, by Julie Freeman is available now through Amazon.com.

Going Out

Going Out Going Out Significant others from time to time go out with their partners to gender events. These events may be at a hotel, a couple's home, or even a restaurant. Usually they attend with others whether it be a monthly Tri-Ess meeting, a DVG rap group, or California Dreamin'. Their partners are pleased that they attend these somewhat "protected" events and may even express a desire for their significant other to go out in public with them - perhaps shopping at a nearby mall, go to a movie or play, or out to dinner.


Some wives feel comfortable and have no problems going out in public. Some wives never go out with their husbands, ...
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DISCLAIMER: 

Nothing on this site should be viewed as providing therapeutic advice. No formation of a client/therapist
relationship with Dr. Vitale is intended or to be implied or inferred. The information provided in this site is for educational
purposes only. I attempt to keep the information current but make no representation or warranties in that regard. You should
not rely upon this information as a substitute for consul with a qualified mental health professional.